i've had a bad reminder all day that troublewaits has

been here one month and if she isn't back by

now i'd have to call her out.

say: i hate everyone,

no more seal of approval on one more human being, a

 decade later first person you fall with is a nameless, invisible child.

makes sense to me.

Something is coming, i don't know what.

Oh first, are there any on-line sensitive lili-killin

sins-of-omission and couldn't care less

skanky hos hanging around? Webaster, is there a

screening process, i don't want them here,

make them go, can you give them

a virus, why can't i say their names if they're

just cunts, clones, cunts, fakes, handlers,

please explain, again, meanwhile

everyone please think up some new ways

to hurt unaccountable black as hell dark as

night murderering  backstabbing filth and

i'll read them a special portent, come here, Shakespeare

 

to win me soon to hell, my female evil

tempteth my better angel from my side,

and would corrupt my saint to be a devil,

wooing his purity with her foul pride

...i guess one angel in another's hell

yet this shall i ne'er know, but live in doubt

til my bad angel fire my good one out.

sonnet 144

 

something's coming but i don't know what.

this is it, she did it right, reader, go look, what

would you think if you were me? can you

find a clue as to what she

was trying to get?

once i woke up the scholar, good

morning rich man one of your invited guests is now

loading the 38 lead-head bullets, is this

all part of the grand design? So i asked him if i could

(lili, if you're reading this, i'm sorry, hon, will never again think such a thing, ever, i've read a lot of books the last month, ok,) but i

 told the scholar i will have you committed if

it was the last thing i did, and he emailed me back a taunt,

webaster, can we put it up,

i have it you know, let me know and i'll send it to you,

 basically, it says sure i spoze you could have her committed, of course you'd need to know her name and location first.

is there a hacker in the house?

come to me.

 

another elusive almost person, almost.

 film-maker

 teacher

 leader

artist

satirist

 boy toy

bard

activist

(note: not fuckin zealot),

gone, lost, abducted, stolen, deserted, severed, kidnapped, taken, estranged, un-wanted, un-lamented almost 22,

almost unbeatable.

angel-bait

something to be spoken of quickly in the past tense and then just as quickly forgotten.

wonders if she could almost really be the best person on

every road

she loses herself

myopia: the need to connect

everyone gets ten seconds to play their rusty lone

  instrument

ten seconds then

 enough's enough

when lili is the boston pops.

thank you for the best 3 months i'll see again, ever,

 teaching me how to love again, fuck again, live and write again, 

from you and for you,

 this bitterness will forever

explode rocks.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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